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Salakaar (Season 1)

Farhad Dalal Founder
By-
Farhad Dalal
Rating
1.5 Star popcorn reviewss

Introduction

By the end of the new Hindi show Salakaar, I lost the count of slow-mos that were inflicted in the drama. There is one at the start to introduce a character with a heavy moustache, there is another to introduce you to the key protagonist in the current timeline, another one to introduce a younger version of the same character in a parallel flashback, and yet another for a character blares away while standing on podiums (no, not whom you thinkšŸ˜‚). And I am sure, I have missed mentioning a couple of slow-mos along the way! In other words, Salakaar remains that one rare series that would have ended up being a short film if the slow-mos were removed. And this is also because the written material literally makes a mockery of a real-life personality who remains a powerful figure in the Indian Security Agency. And if not for anything else, he deserved a better story, instead of a show that literally unfolds in binaries, as opposed to spending time on world building and characterization. Hell, even when a female character was being beaten up and dying – a scene that was meant to send an outrage signal to your brain, I really couldn’t care less. Hence, it brought me to the question – why was this show even made?

Story & Screenplay

The tacky nature of the drama can be determined from its very first scene involving the (slow-mo) introduction of Ashfaq (Surya Sharma) in a graveyard with a cricket bat. In another world, it could have meant the death of a cricket for a ‘neighbouring’ team who have been performing at their absolute worst in recent times, but then I digress. But what that introduction made me believe was that I was already in trouble with the content that was to follow on the show – even though I silently awaited a miracle to transpire while coming to terms with my fate. It is just the intuition that film critics face while smelling a train-wreck of a content within the first reel of the show/film. But as is the nature of our job, we have to watch through the mediocrity, even as I hoped for Ashfaq to end my torture with the cricket bat that he instead chose to smash a fringe character!

In the heart of things, the story follows the chronicles of Adhir Dayal (Purnendu Bhattacharya), a same-name-but-different-name of a real life character who is tasked with the rescue of a ‘honey-trap’ spy Agent Mariam (Mouni Roy), who is secretly tasked to pass on vital information from Ashfaq. And the dim-witted nature of the enemy cannot be discounted either – Mariam uses AI glasses to scan and transfer documents right under Ashfaq’s nose, but Ashfaq remains woefully unaware, instead falling head over heels for her and preparing to get married. It is the kind of the binary piece of writing that I had referred to in my opening paragraph.

The story is further bifurcated to a past incident from the year 1978, wherein a young Adhir (Naveen Kasturia) working as a diplomat in Islamabad, who is tasked to foil ISI’s discreet mission to build a nuclear bomb. This is such an important event in the history of the two countries, given how India was yet to be a nuclear power in that timeline. But it is here that the binary nature of the drama kicks in (by the way, did anyone notice on how the agencies had enough time to narrate an entire flashback on the show?) – you are introduced to a (slow-mo) caricaturish version of Zia Ulla (Mukesh Rishi), who is only known to flair up people with his high-pitch speeches, with an iota of stillness or restraint. And to win his trust what does Adhir do? He masterminds a fake attack at a school, only to save Zia’s grandson, to win his trust! It is the kind of loose writing that you witness in B-grade films – where there is no buildup, no drama around the incident, just directly getting done with the event.

At a point, I was really confused on whether the screenplay is indeed working like a spoof? Because if that was the case, then the events are indeed laughable like the ones in the English film The Naked Gun (2025). In two separate instances, you see Adhir donning different disguises in order to obtain information about the nuclear reactor. And….wait for it, no one thinks he is suspicious! Also, there are no rules to the drama – there is a flashback within a flashback, a clear case of such poor and lazy writing that it infuriated me to no bounds. I mean, is this even a screenplay to boast of?

The characters are so poorly sketched that it is baffling on how this written material was even approved. At a point, you see a late introduction of another important figure in Indian history who was also the ex President of India, and has enormous achievements in the field of Science. But the character itself felt like a borrowed one from say The Kapil Sharma Show, that is so ridiculous that the emotions just did not arrive (remember how beautifully Arjun Radhakrishnan played the same character in Rocket Boys (2022) ?). After a point, I had given up on the show – simply going through the motions as the young Adhir foils the plan with the help of a local sarpanch who thinks he is an NGO worker. And his reply is also cringe-worthy – ‘No, I am just a good neighbour’.

Also, these broad strokes just don’t seem to end with every character being coded as the one from the Hindi films of the 70s, given their binary traits. In a climax that is heavily inspired by Argo (2012) (and by this time you do know the character links from the past to the current timeline), it almost made me facepalm at the antics of some of the characters at the airport. There is no other way to put it – it was laughable to the core as opposed to a tense sequence leading up to a gripping finale, wherein some characters were showcased as incapable dimwits, even as the ace lay with the protagonists. But what was the eventual cherry on the cake, was a sequence from the cockpit that was so outrageous that I invariably clapped while being pumped to the core! Again, if this was a spoof, this was a five out of five, but because it did wish to take itself seriously – the results are for everyone to see! And ‘that man’ (you will all know who when you watch the show)Ā  deserves a better story – is all I can say!

Dialogues, Music & Direction

The dialogues are outrageously ridiculous given how the lines choose to further enunciate the Urdu-for-dummies notion in a rather binary form. Words like ‘Mansoobon’ and ‘Mulk’ are flung towards the viewers, as opposed to anchoring the drama in reality. The music is often used as a medium to evoke a sense of patriotism, but even the songs are tacky that will further dissociate you from the drama. The BGM is there in every single scene – from the slow-motion shots, to the smallest of actions from characters. No single shot is used in isolation without a blaring BGM that sinks the drama beyond redemption. The cinematography comprises of mostly VFX-driven frames, that never really transport you to the bygone era or the location where the drama is staged. It is so poor, that you must see it to believe it.

The only good thing about the drama is its editing – not because you spot a skillful technique here, but you owe one to the editor for limiting this torturous show to just 5 episodes with a runtime of a shade under 150 minutes (told ya, remove the slow-mos and this is a short film). Director Faruk Kabir is usually a very safe director, having wonderfully scored with films like Khuda Hafiz. But here, the direction is immensely incompetent with zero redemption to the point that it is laughable (although I am unsure if this was designed to be intentional). I kid you not when I say that the direction is of the lowest quality ever, even as an ambitious story is woefully letdown by negligible world building and characterization. The less said about the direction, the better.

Performances

Such is the nature of the drama that none of the characters manage to impress. Janhavi Hardas as Jyoti has hardly anything substantial to do. Sidharth Bhardwaj as Noor has a fake accent that wants to make us believe that he is a sarpanch of a village in Pakistan. Ashwath Bhatt plays a Pakistani for the millionth time on celluloid, and these are the characters that he can literally sleepwalk through, which he does. Purnendu Bhattacharya has got probably the only slow-motion induced role of his career as Adhir, and he is just about okay. Surya Sharma (such a talented performer otherwise) as Ashfaq tries to emote through his eyes but cannot get past the dim-witted nature of his character that often stalls his performance. Mouni Roy as Agent Mariam plays one of the several versions of her characters from her filmography, neither having the body language or the agility of a spy, while coming across as quite derivative. Mukesh Rishi as Zia is an absolute caricature, and it almost felt like he was in ‘Bulla’ mode from his film Gunda (1998). Naveen Kasturia as young Adhir is restraint and shows some spark, until the writing chooses to present him as a caricature with his multiple getups. It was perhaps the most forgettable outing for Naveen in his filmography.

Conclusion

The first season of Salakaar is a slow-mo inflicted espionage thriller that is an epitome of mediocrity. If this is the standard of storytelling, then better not make the show at all! Available on JioHotstar.

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